I myself felt it a few weeks ago; I just helped a friend through the process the other day:
Being alone hurts, at least at first.
"There is safety in numbers." Being able to trust someone, to open yourself to many and be consistently surrounded by people provides you with numerous outlets. But, it is also restricting.
Asking for permission, seeking advice, coming to consensus: All of these are incredibly empowering activities within groups, and I believe that more group-centered individuals really need to work more on their consensus abilities.
The individual, however, has no need to ask permission. The men or womyn [or anyone who've reached beyond the gender binary] who travel the solo path seek no advice other than the advice of the heart. Consensus is formed the moment the decision to act is made.
As I said before, being alone hurts. Our society does not train us to be alone. We are not trained to think for ourselves, because there is no one to tell us who we are. We are not taught how to take care of ourselves because each of us have different needs. Instead we are drowned in a sea of useless information.
A few weeks ago I cut myself from all forms of media, just for one day. No internet, no phone, no books, no magazines, no radio, no television: No mass media in any form.
I accomplished more, intellectually, in that one day than I had in months. I formulated a theory of the 'world as-is' and the loner's place within that world in that one day. Over the next week I filled in the missing holes but the majority of the work came forth in a single conversation with myself. It was empowering. By eliminating outside messages I discovered my voice, and I discovered how powerful my voice can be.
When you are alone there is no one to hold you except for yourself, and for the spiritualist out there, whatever deity you believe in. The solo quest is a profoundly spiritual path, but more on that later.
There are no groups of friends waiting for you. There is nobody waiting at the end of the tunnel to welcome you into the fold of loners. There is only you, and the path; a path no one has ever traversed before you.
Walk with pride.
17.4.10
Dangers of being alone:
I'l be the first to admit; being alone is not for everyone.
There is an intense amount of skill, dedication, perseverance, ingenuity and confidence that is required to go through life alone.
You have to be able to rely on yourself for everything; That includes emotional support, spiritual guidance, philosophical inquiries, entertainment, motivation, inspiration and joy.
When faced with being alone, many break down. They cry, they yearn for attention, they reach out.
I've done the same many times.
But life is forcing me to take the loner's path. I have systematically lost everything that is or was meaningful to me. Every memory has been desecrated, tainted by recent realizations of the people in my life. The people immediately around me do not share the same interest, and in fact dwell in the very things I aim to fight in this world.
And so, here I go. I continue down my path, more alone than when I started. I don't know how this will end.
I will stand the test alone if I have to. I will be all the stronger for it. All the more self-reliant.
There is an intense amount of skill, dedication, perseverance, ingenuity and confidence that is required to go through life alone.
You have to be able to rely on yourself for everything; That includes emotional support, spiritual guidance, philosophical inquiries, entertainment, motivation, inspiration and joy.
When faced with being alone, many break down. They cry, they yearn for attention, they reach out.
I've done the same many times.
But life is forcing me to take the loner's path. I have systematically lost everything that is or was meaningful to me. Every memory has been desecrated, tainted by recent realizations of the people in my life. The people immediately around me do not share the same interest, and in fact dwell in the very things I aim to fight in this world.
And so, here I go. I continue down my path, more alone than when I started. I don't know how this will end.
I will stand the test alone if I have to. I will be all the stronger for it. All the more self-reliant.
13.4.10
Beauty
Something that often goes unnoticed by large crowds, or people talking with their closest friend: how beautiful the world is.
The way the sun reflects off the windows. How green and full the grass looks, and how soft and comforting it feels. The way the wind dances through the trees. If you close your eyes, and let the sounds of nature wash over you, you will find complete acceptance. Watching a cat, no matter what it's doing, often brings self-awareness and complete joy.
There i so much beauty to be found in the world. So much of it just waits for us to stop, smell the roses, and find inner peace.
So much o four time is devoted to cell phones, twitter, FB, reading blogs, listening to the news corp., working, buying things we really don't need, watching mindless entertainment.
Get out. Get away.
Taking a solitary walk, sit underneath a tree, and breathe.
The way the sun reflects off the windows. How green and full the grass looks, and how soft and comforting it feels. The way the wind dances through the trees. If you close your eyes, and let the sounds of nature wash over you, you will find complete acceptance. Watching a cat, no matter what it's doing, often brings self-awareness and complete joy.
There i so much beauty to be found in the world. So much of it just waits for us to stop, smell the roses, and find inner peace.
So much o four time is devoted to cell phones, twitter, FB, reading blogs, listening to the news corp., working, buying things we really don't need, watching mindless entertainment.
Get out. Get away.
Taking a solitary walk, sit underneath a tree, and breathe.
11.4.10
Getting away
Being alone is something to be feared. Being alone is dangerous. Being alone is dangerous to society, and to yourself. When you're alone, you're probably doing something wrong.
That's what we're told. That is what we see everywhere we go.
I have a different voice I listen to, she says:
Being alone is where you can find safety. Being alone is comforting. Being alone is empowering. When you're alone, you can open your eyes and truly see the world around you.
When I'm surrounded by people who know my name, and expect interaction, I am often putting aside my own beliefs and values for a time. I do not condone many things that drive conversation these days; Nor do I understand them.
I don't find violence, sexual objectification, racism or any other form of oppression to be humorous, inspiring or entertaining. In fact, I detest all of these.
Yet, there is a surplus of dead baby jokes, dumb blond jokes, race-specific jokes out there. I can't go outside without hearing a disability made fun of, a sexual orientation mocked at best, or spat upon.
In society there is a profound lack of love and acceptance. Society has compassion fatigue, otherwise known as Secondary Traumatic Stress Disorder. The news has sensationalized us so much that death, racism, sexism, hetero-sexism, and all other forms of oppression are not only normal, but great bonding moments amongst the teens to twenty-somethings.
When I see the humor behind hate, the twinkle of an eye after a oppressive joke, I cringe, and my hatred for humanity grows.
When I am alone, I am filled with love. for myself, for this world and it's inhabitants.
When I am alone, I want to help the world, to save it from itself in any way I can.
When I am alone, I work towards that goal.
That's what we're told. That is what we see everywhere we go.
I have a different voice I listen to, she says:
Being alone is where you can find safety. Being alone is comforting. Being alone is empowering. When you're alone, you can open your eyes and truly see the world around you.
When I'm surrounded by people who know my name, and expect interaction, I am often putting aside my own beliefs and values for a time. I do not condone many things that drive conversation these days; Nor do I understand them.
I don't find violence, sexual objectification, racism or any other form of oppression to be humorous, inspiring or entertaining. In fact, I detest all of these.
Yet, there is a surplus of dead baby jokes, dumb blond jokes, race-specific jokes out there. I can't go outside without hearing a disability made fun of, a sexual orientation mocked at best, or spat upon.
In society there is a profound lack of love and acceptance. Society has compassion fatigue, otherwise known as Secondary Traumatic Stress Disorder. The news has sensationalized us so much that death, racism, sexism, hetero-sexism, and all other forms of oppression are not only normal, but great bonding moments amongst the teens to twenty-somethings.
When I see the humor behind hate, the twinkle of an eye after a oppressive joke, I cringe, and my hatred for humanity grows.
When I am alone, I am filled with love. for myself, for this world and it's inhabitants.
When I am alone, I want to help the world, to save it from itself in any way I can.
When I am alone, I work towards that goal.
7.4.10
Erase
The tears you shed will fall,
unseen.
As belligerent boys shout obscenities
from afar.
Rocket fueled phalli fly,
through invisible borders,
into the homes of children
whose mothers
can't
afford
water.
Is this the pride of humanity?
The ultimate achievement?
Murder is science.
A technological breakthrough.
To kill - without being seen,
without seeing,
without moving,
without feeling.
Our God is an awesome god,
whose fury is unmatched,
even by our atomic erasers.
Oh, how we aspire to match his greatness.
unseen.
As belligerent boys shout obscenities
from afar.
Rocket fueled phalli fly,
through invisible borders,
into the homes of children
whose mothers
can't
afford
water.
Is this the pride of humanity?
The ultimate achievement?
Murder is science.
A technological breakthrough.
To kill - without being seen,
without seeing,
without moving,
without feeling.
Our God is an awesome god,
whose fury is unmatched,
even by our atomic erasers.
Oh, how we aspire to match his greatness.
6.4.10
A hard-earned right
A beautiful thing about being a loner:
My time is spent researching, studying, playing, composing, living, breathing, hiking, being.
My experience goes beyond my years, because my life is full of wonder and creation.
Having had all these experiences, I have found my limits, and uncovered my beliefs.
I have been desocializing myself over the years, and can proudly say the majority of my beliefs are mine, and not the regurgitation of my parents nor the corporations in power.
As such, I can speak with much more confidence and authority on issues, because I have asked myself what I believe, and discovered my truth.
When I speak, people listen. I may not be friends with everyone, I may not go with them to the bars, or talk about the tv show we watched the night before.
But I am respected.
My time is spent researching, studying, playing, composing, living, breathing, hiking, being.
My experience goes beyond my years, because my life is full of wonder and creation.
Having had all these experiences, I have found my limits, and uncovered my beliefs.
I have been desocializing myself over the years, and can proudly say the majority of my beliefs are mine, and not the regurgitation of my parents nor the corporations in power.
As such, I can speak with much more confidence and authority on issues, because I have asked myself what I believe, and discovered my truth.
When I speak, people listen. I may not be friends with everyone, I may not go with them to the bars, or talk about the tv show we watched the night before.
But I am respected.
For a purple world:
Purple reflections of a long gone age
ripple across the waters of Time.
Red had intensified, so long ago,
spreading it's liquid namesake and rage.
Sweet-tempered Blue, and the magic she did know,
was trapped in the darkness, having broken no crime.
Red, thinking himself stronger of the two,
forged new secrets and worshiped the blade.
Carving his way through the streets of history
he sought a change, to create the world anew.
Seeking one truth, he told His Story,
in place of the old, new religions were made.
But Blue, lonely Blue, shed a solitary tear
before being forgotten, lost and confused.
Ever present, but ignored, she rebuilds the broken,
defending the weak she gives courage to Fear.
Love, Peace and Goodness are all signs of her token.
Had she full power, no one would be abused.
As long as we all wear, those glasses of red:
Hate, War & Torture will be our Gravy Train.
But if you would like, to change our cup of tea
to something a little sweeter instead.
Then come, stand here, and give your hand to me;
Show the Red you're Blue, and end his bloody reign.
ripple across the waters of Time.
Red had intensified, so long ago,
spreading it's liquid namesake and rage.
Sweet-tempered Blue, and the magic she did know,
was trapped in the darkness, having broken no crime.
Red, thinking himself stronger of the two,
forged new secrets and worshiped the blade.
Carving his way through the streets of history
he sought a change, to create the world anew.
Seeking one truth, he told His Story,
in place of the old, new religions were made.
But Blue, lonely Blue, shed a solitary tear
before being forgotten, lost and confused.
Ever present, but ignored, she rebuilds the broken,
defending the weak she gives courage to Fear.
Love, Peace and Goodness are all signs of her token.
Had she full power, no one would be abused.
As long as we all wear, those glasses of red:
Hate, War & Torture will be our Gravy Train.
But if you would like, to change our cup of tea
to something a little sweeter instead.
Then come, stand here, and give your hand to me;
Show the Red you're Blue, and end his bloody reign.
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